Directed by: Jac Schaeffer
Starring: Emma Caulfield, John Patrick Amedori, Scott Holroyd
I like science fiction as much as the next nerd, and I’m firmly of the idea that you can do a good sci-fi story that appeals to a wider audience than usual by taking out the spaceships and the giant slug aliens and what have you. That being said, there are still a lot– a LOT, of really bad science fiction out there, and Timer is one of them.
So the premise is that there’s a device that you get implanted in your arm and it tells you how long it’s going to be until you meet your “perfect match.” Our main character is a crazy cat lady who’s really excited about the device, but hers is blank, meaning that she either already met the guy (and moved on), or that he hasn’t had one of these things installed for one reason or other. So basically it’s a romantic comedy about this girl finding guys without timers and forcing them to get one just in case they’re the one. It’s as desperate and borderline neurotic as it sounds.
There are some concepts in this film that they explore and they’re the kind of things you would want to see in this movie, but it unfortunately gets bogged down by way too much explanation and ill-informed technobabble. If you have even a high school biology education, it’s immediately obvious that they have no clue what they’re talking about. This is one of those primary sins that people do in science fiction; it’s really not necessary to explain your one technological miracle in your movie, just say what it is and move on. People will accept it because it’s just a damn movie. Once you start trying to explain how something that could never possibly work in real life would work in real life, all you do is waste time and jar the audience out of the narrative. So I guess if that doesn’t bother you and that’s just a pet peeve of mine, this is a bland enough romantic comedy, I guess.