Frozen (2013)

frozenFrozen (2013)

Directed by: Chris Buck, Jennifer Lee

Starring: Kristen Bell, Josh Gad, Idina Menzel

two-stars

Remember Tangled? Well now you get to see it… AGAIN! Only THIS time, there’s more of a kind of a snowy/icy sorta theme goin’ on? But mostly it’s just Tangled again. Hell, they didn’t even change the character models from the previous film, probably saved ’em a bunch of money. I’m guessing whoever came up with that idea got a raise and a promise that if he never changes those models again, he’ll keep getting more of the same! I can’t wait for Disney’s 2015 movie where a quirky princess falls in love with a muscly doofus but neither of them count on the fact that she has magic powers! Maybe something to do with fire? That hasn’t been done in a while. Hey Disney, can I get a paycheck for this?

Two princess sisters grow up alone in a castle apart from each other because one of them has ice powers and she accidentally killed her sister once (but some trolls brought her back so it’s all good, don’t worry about it). When it’s time for the ice princess to become an ice queen, she accidentally freezes the kingdom and runs away to an ice castle in the ice mountains of ice. So the other princess has to go after her with the aid of a random guy she meets to stop the premature winter, and along the way they meet an obnoxious cartoon snowman and a bunch of cute trolls and it’s basically whimsical and full of music and all that other shit.

The biggest problem with this movie is that it focuses more on finding its way to the next musical number than it does focusing on its actual plot. The third act is a gigantic mess after the main girl visits her sister and fails to convince her to stop because she just starts wandering around with no purpose. A hundred confusing things happen and each of them is accompanied by a grating song. If that’s your thing, then I guess you’ll be pretty happy with Frozen. Of course, if you’re looking for good quality kid’s entertainment, you might have to go back 10  years or so in Disney’s animated classics lineup to find it.

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