Jaws III (1983)

Jaws III (1983)

Directed by: Joe Alves

Starring: Dennis Quaid, Bess Armstrong, Simon MacCorkindale

I’m slowly working my way through all these awful Jaws sequels, and boy am I glad that I am! Otherwise, how could I possibly see a movie about girls in bikinis being attacked and eaten by sharks? As far as I know, these Jaws movies are the only ones that have anything even remotely similar to that concept in them!

Sea World has a new underwater theme park called the Undersea Kingdom, and Dennis Quaid works there with his girlfriend! Everything seems fine until people start turning up half-eaten and they find a great white shark on the premises. They manage to capture it but it dies in captivity… and also it isn’t nearly big enough to be behind all these killings. Oh look, it’s the huge mama shark and it’s here to rip shit up, uh oh.

I like how every Jaws movie has to end with the shark exploding, for some reason. Is that the only way you can kill a shark? By blowing it up with explosives or extreme electricity or something? That seems like a super power more people would know about, what with all the shark weeks they have these days and what have you. Seems to me like you could just shoot it or something, but maybe that isn’t dramatic enough, I dunno.

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About Reid

Born in a dumpster, died in a fire. View all posts by Reid

One response to “Jaws III (1983)

  • gregory moss

    I saw it as Jaws 3D back in the day (nothing to be proud of). The 3D didn’t help. And what was the hell was Richard Matheson thinking? Was he really that hard up for cash?

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