Moonraker (1979)

Moonraker (1979)

Directed by: Lewis Gilbert

Starring: Roger Moore, Lois Chiles, Michael Lonsdale

When I said that I liked a couple Roger Moore James Bond movies, I mainly meant that I like Moonraker. It’s the biggest and stupidest of all the Bond movies, but it’s so damn goofy that it just goes around the horn again and becomes a lot of fun.

A villain named Drax is stealing space shuttles so he can use them to start his own perfect society on a space station in orbit. He’s planning on using a big, titular laser to wipe out life on Earth, so of course they call in James Bond to deal with it. If this story sounds a lot like The Spy Who Loved Me, that’s because it is the EXACT SAME MOVIE BUT IN SPACE. They even both have Jaws in them as the primary henchman, though he does turn into a good guy in this film and has way more depth than just a huge dude with goofy metal teeth.

The climactic battle in this film is a bunch of guys in space suits shooting laser guns at each other in outer space. It’s fucking hilarious, and if it doesn’t make you laugh you’re even more humorless and dead inside than I am. Bond never gets this cartoonishly ridiculous again, but that’s good. You can’t take an entire diet of marshmallows, but an occasional drunken meal of nothing but is good for the soul.

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