Directed by: Drew Goddard
Starring: Richard Jenkins, Bradley Whitford, Kristen Connolly
Hey, neat poster. It has nothing whatsoever to do with the movie, but it’s pretty neat nonetheless. Now, for those of you who are going to scream at me about the “spoilers” I put in the next paragraph here: There are going to be “spoilers” in the next paragraph here.
The Cabin in the Woods is about a group of scientists or something who are responsible for gathering a generic slasher movie cast once a year to a cabin (in the woods) so they can orchestrate a generic slasher movie there. They do this to appease Cthulu or something, who I guess is a big fan of Halloween. I put “spoilers” in quotes in the last paragraph because you learn this information basically immediately, and it is not a big reveal at the end of a normal horror movie or anything.
Really, the problem with trying to do a tongue-in-cheek version of a slasher movie within this other movie is that they spend the whole film deriding the exact same dumb tricks they use at the end when it’s supposed to actually be scary. It’s a self-hating horror movie, and it feels like they just made a normal slasher movie and covered it with a grimy layer of smug satisfaction. If you think the idea of a movie telling you that horror movies are goofy is a hilarious and new idea, then you might as well see this movie. It’s not like you have anything better to do with your time.