Directed by: Raja Gosnell
Starring: Hank Azaria, Jonathan Winters, Neil Patrick Harris
People often tell me that I’m never pleased with movies, or even that I “hate everything”. That’s why, in some perverse way, I like watching movies like The Smurfs, because NOBODY would ever say that I’m impossible to please because I didn’t like this pile of shit.
Several Smurfs and Gargamel get sucked through a Masters of the Universe-esque portal to the real world, where they test Neil Patrick Harris’ sanity. At least, that’s how I chose to perceive the movie, as just one terrible, product-placement-heavy drug trip of Harris’.
It’s almost not even worth talking about this film, because… what’s the point? You already know it’s terrible. EVERYBODY knows that. All you have to do is hear, “they made a live-action Smurfs movie” and you know. The Smurfs contains everything wrong with modern blockbuster filmmaking, and it made $600 million. Basically, fuck every one of you who paid to see this, you’re the reason they keep making shit like this.