Samurai Cop (1989)

Samurai Cop (1989)

Directed by: Amir Shervan

Starring: Robert Z’Dar, Matt Hannon, Jannis Farley

Oh my god, Samurai Cop. This movie was a thousand times more amazing than I could’ve ever dreamed. As a bad movie aficionado, I can safely say that you don’t get the opportunity to see really terrible films like this every day. It’s far and beyond most other so-bad-it’s-good movies I’ve seen… You just have to see this shit, man.

A Japanese gangster and his group of evil samurai are terrorizing a town… supposedly. They mention something about drugs and kids at some point, so I guess that’s what they do. The police force bring in Joe Marshall, aka Joe Samurai, a cop from San Francisco who learned the samurai arts from the “greatest masters in the world”. His strategy of shooting everybody in his path that may or may not be bad guys works out pretty well for him, and he defeats the Katana Gang by… murdering them all.

There’s so much amazing shit in this movie, I can’t possibly mention it all. Let’s see… okay, Joe Samurai is supposed to be fluent in Japanese (he translates “katana” as meaning “Japanese sword”), yet he can’t pronounce the gangster boss’ name. The film will consistently cut HALFWAY THROUGH AN ACTION SEQUENCE to show unrelated footage of people having sex. Joe Samurai’s sidekick constantly makes faces to the camera, in between barely being able to deliver his lines. It’s like an actual movie made by Garth Merenghi. Aaaggghhh, SO BAD! I LOVE IT!!

 

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About Reid

Born in a dumpster, died in a fire. View all posts by Reid

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