The Last Witness (1985)

The Last Witness (1985)

Directed by: E. Bruce Weiss

Starring: Jeff Henderson, Mike Shuster, Vicki Long

Man, ANOTHER movie that isn’t on IMDb. That makes three just in this batch of VHS tapes so far, and I’ve still got about a hundred of these things left. And on a related note, why the hell are there listings on Yahoo! Movies that aren’t on IMDb? For that matter, why does such a thing as Yahoo! Movies even exist in the first place? What the hell, the internet? I demand to speak to your supervisor.

The Last Witness is about an escaped convict and how every woman wants to bone him and all non-police men want to help him for no reason, even though he constantly betrays everybody he comes across. Apparently it’s supposed to be some government conspiracy that’s after him or something, but really all I got out of it was that the guy was an asshole and that everyone he talked to died.

The unlikable protagonist aside, this is a pretty standard sort of action film. Lots of hanging around in bars and asking people for cigarettes and camping in the woods… Wait, none of that is standard action movie stuff! What the hell, I’ve been gypped!

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