JFK (1991)

JFK (1991)

Directed by: Oliver Stone

Starring: Kevin Costner, Tommy Lee Jones, Gary Oldman

I pretty much say this with every one of his movies I watch, but I can’t help it: How the hell did Kevin Costner get a film career? Pretty much everyone else in this star-studded cavalcade of political intrigue turns in a decent-to-good performance (except Gary Oldman, who is, of course, fucking perfect as Lee Harvey Oswald), and then Costner slowly swaggers in with his super fakey southern accent and his expressionless chase after an evil conspiracy.

JFK is about the (I dunno, semi-fictional, semi-historical? Whatever, I really don’t care) conspiracy that was ACTUALLY behind the assassination of John Kennedy. One Texas district attorney makes it his mission to root out the real killer, since he thinks Lee Harvey Oswald was a patsy. What follows is a long, long, long, long, long and arduous series of talking to various people with various states of bad southern accents, and eventually a climactic court sequence.

Note to movies: Just because an awesome movie like To Kill a Mockingbird or …And Justice for All can have a great climactic courtroom sequence doesn’t mean that it’s an automatic gateway to making your movie great. Seriously, just please stop. Unless Fred Gwynn is the judge, there’s nothing I’d rather see less in a film than an extended courtroom sequence.

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