Eragon (2006)

Eragon (2006)

Directed by: Stefen Fangmeier

Starring: Ed Speleers, Sienna Guillory, Jeremy Irons

Ahh, I see. It’s like “dragon”… but one more. Because E is ahead of D. No, that’s clever. Wow. And the guy actually rides a dragon! Brilliant. This is sure to be a classic tale for years to come. So clever.

Eragon is a farm boy who finds a dragon egg and it hatches, so he has to learn how to be a jedi. Luckily, Obi-Wan Jeremy Irons is there to teach him how to ride his dragon and use magic powers. They have to avoid orcs and uruk-hai so they can get to the white city of Minas Tirith where the rebel alliance is getting ready for their big battle against Saruman (played by John Malkovich).

So… you can kinda see where the ideas for this movie came from. I mean, yeah, EVERY work of fantasy since the 70’s has directly cribbed from Lord of the Rings, obviously, but there’s definitely a pretty big chunk of Star Wars in there too. And combining Star Wars and Lord of the Rings into a single film… why, you couldn’t possibly fail! Even if it is just fucking terrible on every possible level! WHEN’S THE SEQUEL COMING OUT?!

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